For the bored with Disabilities
Sometimes being disabled can be a total bore. It’s seems to get worse when it’s around holiday seasons. So, with Turkey Day being just around the corner I thought it might be nice to suggest ways (though I’m not responsible if you’re insane enough to try them) to keep yourself entertained at the dinner table.
1. Stick a firecracker up the turkey’s butt. Say it’s a candle and light it. You’re actually doing your family a favour since no one really likes 300 meals of leftover turkey anyway.
2. Smear cranberry sauce on yourself and scream that the turkey attacked you and does anyone have a band aid.
3. Make yourself a beard out of the whipped cream. If anyone yells, say, “HO HO HO!!!!” and rub your tummy.
4. If asked if you’d like dressing, say, “I never eat anything that comes out of somethings butt.”
5. Lastly, if your family hasn’t had you hauled away in the twinkie mobile by now - shove your hand down the hole where the turkey’s neck once was and scream that it’s eating you alive.
You’re guaranteed to have a wonderful time watching the expressions on everyone’s face.
This Turkey Day’s motto: Dare to be a moron!
Sites to check out:
Humor Matters - Thanksgiving
Off the Mark Thanksgiving toons
Andertoons
Technorati Tags: thanksgiving, humor, humour, turkey, turkey day, pranks, bored, disabilities
2 Comments »
dena said :
November 11, 2008 at 2:54 pm
My family would be shocked of anyone pulled one of these stunts and it would be hilarious.
YO said :
November 11, 2008 at 7:02 pm
hee hee hee! I wish I’d thought of these things when we used to go to my grandparents for Turkey Day. :]
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